"District 9" - C

I purposefully avoided reviews and fanboy hype about "District 9" before seeing it on opening night. I entered with just a general understanding about the movie's premise and without any expectations for the production.

I feel confident that things would have gone much much better had Peter Jackson actually been at the helm rather than behind the scenes.....

Summary: Goofy-looking aliens decide to park their seemingly busted space craft over Johannesburg to live, procreate and annoy the locals. The creatures dubbed "the prawns" are herded into a slum to live under the regulatory control of a governmental agency, which decides the aliens should move from the slums into a concentration camp away from their human neighbors.

Much of how the story is told comes in a "mock-umentary" format intermingled with news clips, interviews and some oddly placed third-person perspectives. It's all over the place and not in a good enjoy-the-ride kind of way.

And plot development drags and bounces from one inconsistent or somewhat illogical position into another head-scratching moment of overall unpleasantness. It's like someone wanted to cram parts of "Alien Nation" with "Starship Troopers" with a human rights drama about apartheid. It didn't work, and it wasn't entertaining.

There are some pretty interesting action sequences, but the CG on a lot of the alien full-body scenes is only a cut above rendered graphics from a gaming console. The work on the ship is much better than a lot of other CG-dependent stuff you might have seen lately.

This movie is not groundbreaking territory for the genre - it's a mess of a story with a messy way of conveying itself. Again, Peter Jackson would have taken the time to get it right and make it watchable.

Overall I think "District 9" should be taken as a the quirky, dark and sticky summer flick it's meant to be. Do not look for this one to shatter the sci-fi scene, make you re-think films in general or otherwise blow you away.

Grade: C (rent it or see it at the second-run dollar theater)

Rapid round-up o' summer-like pics

"X-Men Origins: Wolverine" - Terrible CG and bad acting abound on straight-to-DVD levels. This is not a worthy successor to the seemingly abandoned franchise. C-


"Angels and Demons" - This one dumps all over some fairly prominent plot points from the pop fiction title. Only a few thrills.... for the most part pretty "meh." - C


"Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian" - Most of the gags are in the trailers. Still.... a good kids flick with enough to keep the more immature adults happy, too. - C+

"Valkyrie" - B+

Enough with the hero pics for director Bryan Singer, and I'm glad for it. This is a solid production with a reverential look back at some real heroes - men and women who put it all on the line to stop real-life evil.

"Valkyrie" is tight and tense viewing. You'll come away with a much better appreciation for the resistance movement and the sacrifices made by these honorable Germans.

Tom Cruise (as Oberst Graf Schenk von Stauffenberg) is deftly surrounded by an able supporting cast. Good performances abound overall, and the on-location use of buildings and locations integral to the story only add to the realism of the film.

It's no secret that the daring plot of July 20, 1944, was not as successful as hoped. But it was instrumental in emboldening others to stand up against tyranny, and Singer gives you sweeping insights into the whole operation.

Grade: B+ (a moving work and a fascinating story)

"The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" - B

A time-traveling delight (of sorts) with enough in the tank to keep nearly anyone happy, "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" is easily a "good buy" for your viewing dollar.

Brad Pitt re-teams with director David Fincher, who as already more than proved his skills with such outings as "Zodiac" and "Fight Club." "Benjamin Button" is decidedly lighter material, but it still bears out the fine craftsmanship of someone who knows how to pull together a good production.

The special effects fantastically bring along a love story spanning the decades of a man aging in reverse, a condition sure to strain his future with lifelong love Cate Blanchett. And there's even a pretty good supporting cast, including a fine performance from Tilda Swinton (who is, for once, not an evildoer).

And while the premise is intriguing, supporters good and effects solid, a sometimes-touching plot gets a little hampered with stutter-step pacing. I had the sense that co-writer Eric Roth brushed off his own "Forrest Gump" notes. I know I saw some of this before when the lead was again developmentally challenged.

And while I do buy Pitt's "Button," this is not the famous lead's best moment. We've seen him make a much larger splash in another film. In other words, standard-issue Pitt awaits you here.

Don't get me wrong - I liked this picture; it's good, entertaining and worth the first-run dollar. But it won't necessarily change your mind about any of those appearing on-screen, and it surely isn't a landmark effort. It's just somewhat better than most of the stuff out there.

Grade: B (a great story even with the flaws)

"The Spirit" - C

Disclaimer: Nothing I have to say about this movie will diminish the wonderful experience of reading Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns. For me, The Dark Knight remains the greatest comic followed closely by Jademan's The Force of Buddha's Palm. So .... on with the review.

"The Spirit" is one of the more singular titles flooding theaters as 2008 comes to close. It sure brings the originality in a field crowded with love stories and kid flicks.

Gabriel Macht slips on the simple black mask and dapper suit to patrol Central City, a gritty crime-heavy metropolis where the sun never shines. The Spirit soon finds himself caught up in a mystery caper with his former best girl, "Sand Saref" (Eve Mendes), and his continuous nemesis, "The Octopus" (Samuel L. Jackson).

Missed opportunities: If you've not experienced the bloody genius of "Sin City," then "The Spirit" will seem truly original and maybe one-of-a-kind. But as I've already seen it and appreciate its artful handling, I was let down by the newcomer. "The Spirit" lacks to an overall "cool" compared with its predecessor.

Just as the manner and method of storytelling reflects the comic origins for the movie, so "The Spirit" suffers some of the pitfalls of straight comic-to-film transference. There are pacing and plot problems that become almost tedious and are not overshadowed by strong performances.

Jackson's just ok; not as evil as you've seen him before. Macht is rigid and seems to carry off the part pretty well, if you're expecting a deficit in the dynamic department. The ladies steal the show with Mendes and Scarlett Johansson ("Silken Floss") providing the comic relief and some much-needed tension.

"The Spirit" isn't terrible, but it is pretty flat. Hopefully, they'll do a better job next time out as Robert Rodriguez helps get the job done.

Grade: C (I'm sure it could have been much worse)

"Quantum Of Solace" - B -

Bond is back, and Daniel Craig's performance in "Quantum of Solace" will do nothing to dissuade you from thinking he is the best incarnation of the character to date.

"Quantum" is a worthy successor to "Casino Royale," but it's a follow-up that misses a step or two on its follow-through.

Borrowing from Bourne: I've stated before my appreciation for how the Jason Bourne franchise managed to take it up a notch with each movie. Sure ... Matt Damon is still around for each production, but the action and pacing is handled well for the genre.

With the new Bond, there are at least two sequences (and I might argue a third) that appear to be "borrowed" from the Bourne line. And the imitation was not a one-upping or better representation of intent.

Which brings me to one of the "Quantum" quandaries -- how could they have messed this up so badly?

The first on-the-ground action sequence (outside of the car chase) felt like bad Bourne. The cinematography was sloppy and dizzy to the point of distraction. I was disappointed to see such a downer in the overall dramatic development due to the shoddy quality.

And the overall story development slips a little from "Casino." There are times where the subplot so overshadows that you might feel as though you missed something. Do yourself the favor of going back to review the "Casino" title before heading out to the theater.

While there's some sophomore slump here, it isn't so terrible as to make it unwatchable. These easily avoidable flaws might distract you as they did me, and yet the final half of the film will make up for it all.

Grade: B - A pretty good action flick even with its flaws. We're promised in the end credits that Bond's going to be back, and I think he'll be better than ever when he does now that this one's out of his system.

"We've Got Movie Sign" -- Big in Europe

"Persepolis" - B

Snooty French-fried films are not typically on my to-watch list, but the nifty little animated import "Persepolis" is really a remarkable film. The graphic novel turned motion picture deftly relays the life experiences of one Marjane Satrapi, who grew up in the revolution and repression of Iran in the 1970s.

Her story offers a compelling perspective on a culture that devalues women, polices the actions of everyone and represses individual freedoms. Some of the observations and experiences are offered as only a child could have interpreted them; others are very adult and stark.

The fact that this tale is told by an artist's hand actually accentuates the impact of social unrest, racism, sexism and all the other horrible sights and sounds some people inflict on their fellow countrymen. Had the film involved actual actors parading around on screen, much of that impact would have been dulled by their predictable reactions.

So, this is a good one to watch when you're in the mood to learn about how a big chunk of the rest of the world lives. It's moving at times and often sad, but has a sense of humor about itself that brings a just balance to the extraordinary events it reveals.

Grade: B (not a kid flick, but an animated picture for adults of every persuasion)

"Superhero Movie" - D

Replete with all the stupid jokes, movie parodies and tasteless humor that you can cram into a PG-13 production, "Superhero Movie" is not nearly as original or funny as it could have been ....

I won't say that there weren't a few laugh-out-loud moments, chiefly at the expense of mocking Dr. Stephen Hawking (Robert Joy).

The movie even let me by showing a Leslie Nielsen who is now well and truly off his game. I think it best if he were to forgo a few future productions and lay low for a while.

Grade: D (for dumb dumb dumb)

"Surf's Up" - C

With this you get an animated mockumentary melded with a coming-of-age tale and sports flick all rolled into one. It's formulaic at best, but it has its moments.

Plot (a term applied here loosely): A goofy-looking penguin (Shia LaBeouf) is the only one of his peers with an interest in the sport of surfing. He has always wanted to prove himself since he personally met surf idol, Big Z (Jeff Bridges).

The kid gets his chance in the biggest venue available -- a world-renowned and televised tournament that features the reigning champ.

It has its moments: This is a family friendly movie with all the animated quirkiness necessary to keep the average non-toddler entertained for a little while. It has a note or two of adult-esque humor, and the voice acting is pretty solid.

I especially enjoyed the appearance of James Woods (that's right, I said the James Woods) as the obnoxious promoter Reggie. He helps move things along at just the right moment with a carefully placed montage or off-hand quip. I dig it. And you can't go wrong with Jon Heder as Chicken Joe.

Grade: C (there are funnier fish in the sea, but this one isn't too terrible to endure ...)

"The Big Lebowski" - 10th Anniversary

This is one of the silliest and yet most polarizing "comedies" I've ever seen.

Many people see it, get it and enjoy watching it again a time or two per year. And still others never make it through an entire setting, are put off by the premise or otherwise hate this film.

To be sure, this is not for everyone. It has many applications of some of the most offensive language you can imagine. But the overall production is beyond comparison. A solid story with memorable lines and characters. Truly, a unique ride.

Now an anniversary edition is on the way, complete with a special collector's print in a neat-looking bowling ball ..... How cool it that?

Look for it everywhere Sept. 9.

"Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" - teaser trailer

A teaser trailer for November's "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" is now available here.

For those of you too lazy to read the youth-fiction novels, this installment will finally tackle that nagging question astute Potter fans always wondered -- "Why does Voldemort kill?"

This will be the next-to-the-last cinematic installment of the franchise before Hollywood takes on the biggest wank in the series -- "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows."

In fact, the money grab for the last (and weakest) title in the seven-book run is soooo enormous that it's supposed to be broken into two separate films separated by nearly a year. You'll have to pay twice to see the big let-down that is the series finale.

Woo Hoo!

While you wait for this year's offering, give your eyes and brain cells the good exercise of actually reading the books before the movie. I mean, you'll be able to read the entire series long before you have to stand in line for the movie....

"Watchmen" watch

Now iTune users have a few things to keep them occupied until "The Watchmen" is released next year.

Take a look around in the iTunes store for the free first chapter of an innovative web comic. Even if you otherwise know the book backwards and forwards, this neat net edition is entertaining and worthy of a viewing.

Also, iTunes has a download of the great teaser trailer.

Give it a whirl .... what have you got to lose?

UPDATE: The iTunes webcomic is now no longer free. The 12-part series will cost you $1.99 per episode or you can buy a season pass for $19.99.

"The Dark Knight" - A

To say that the hype machine was working overtime for the newest Batman flick would be somewhat of an understatement.

The only difference is that this time, the hype is completely justified. The Dark Knight really is that good -- period.

Overview: While Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) continues to come to grips with the practical and symbolic nature of his alter ego, Batman is forced into a very public confrontation with The Joker (Heath Ledger).

Explosions and great public calamity ensue ...

"It's all that": Critics were saying that the late Ledger gave the performance of his life here, that Oscar would come calling posthumously. I tend to agree with this whole line -- I'd never seen the actor show up with this much intensity. You will believe that Ledger is the Joker.

I was a little less wowed by Aaron Eckhart's Harvey Dent (Two Face). The cg for the post-accident Dent was great, but I guess it was not as solid an outing when paired with Ledger's over-the-top Joker.

Overall, The Dark Knight packs a tremendous punch of highly capable actors delivering a moody, dark action storyline and character development. It is rare to see so many elements arrive so well pieced together, and that's what makes this production an outright "A" from start to finish.

A special tip of the cap to director/co-writer Chris Nolan for giving us another great trip to Gotham. His seamless, chilling vision is as close as you'll likely ever get to the progressive and adult-friendly comic books. This is great work, and I appreciated ever minute of it (even the stuff copied from the very fine "Heat").

As a side note, The Dark Knight and the equally enjoyable Iron Man (B+) continue to show that comic books and graphic novels are fantastically original and entertaining for readers of all ages. So do yourself the favor of reading some of these before and after you see the films.

And I couldn't more pumped to see the Watchmen film next year. The Dark Knight was great, but this trailer is giving me goosebumps ...

WATCHMEN trailer 1

"HellBoy 2: The Golden Army" - C

Yes, this movie is not as good as the original. And if you hated the first, you'll likely not enjoy this one.

They spend a lot of time beating you over the head with this boring and unoriginal "love story" angle that gets so old so fast. It makes the whole venture drag from pointless battle to more useless violence.

In short, this is not a worthy successor to the more-entertaining first installment. I hope lessons are learned and mistakes are not repeated.

Grade: C (they just kinda phoned it in ....)

The Rapid Round-Up Of Flicks I've Seen Lately ....

"The Forbidden Kingdom" — Wow! Jackie Chan and Jet Li, together at last. This is going to be great, right? Not so fast ....
This one is one is just good, but only in the way that might satisfy that drive you have for cheap kung fu movies. It isn't spectacular. In fact, it's a sort hop away from being like this other movie I remember. Grade C (not terrible, but not superstar standout ....)

"Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street" — Who would have thought that Johnny Depp could sing. Oh wait .... turns out, he can't.
Helena Bonham Carter is excellent, but everybody else is phoning it in, I think. Grade C (humorous and repetitive application of overly theatrical blood can only get you so far ....)

"There Will Be Blood" — I get it already: greed kills, and oil leads to greed. Ok, thanks for that.
Daniel Day-Lewis is easily one of the most rotten SOBs ever portrayed on film, and he for sure earned his Oscar. Still, for the most part there is so much unnatural dragging in the story as to make it just kind "eh." Grade C+ (it could have been better .... do yourself the favor of checking out one of the movie's great inspirations)

"Cloverfield" — Sort of boring. Nausea-inducing and blurry camera work hide a multitude of sins, including an aimless "plot" and nothing-special CG.
I ended up feeling like I saw about half a movie, and it wasn't the better half. Grade C- (nothing to write home about .... I've seen better)

"Night Watch" — Moody Russian import sci-fi flick. It has all the good vs. evil storyline with an interesting mythology about two eternal races keeping tabs on each other.
It's part of a trilogy of movies, and this is a respectable franchise to see. Grade B- (pretty entertaining ....)

"Enchanted" — So boring, I doubt your child (or the kid inside you) will make it all the way through. Gosh, when will this pointless crap ever end?!? Grade D- (yikes .... I thought this was supposed to be good)

"Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium" — Good alternative to some of the other so-called family friendly flicks. It has enough going on to make kids and adults pay attention and kinda care about what happens to all the wacky people and creatures. Grade C- (better than most ....)

"AvP: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem" - F

Oh boy ... did this ever suck. I mean it; this one was bad.

And to make matters worse, for some idiot reason, this thing was filmed with all the candle power of a dim flashlight. I mean, you shouldn't have to squint at a movie to tell what the @%$& is happening. It's just ridiculous.

The first one was good old fashion sci-fi movie cheese. The new one is a terrible waste of time and money.

Grade: F (a rarity, to be sure .... a film for which there is nothing good to say)

Charlton Heston -- RIP

The great Charlton Heston is now no longer with us, but his impressive catalog of films will forever flood our memories with swaggering lines delivered in his trademarked stoic fashion.

People will usually recall his appearances in the epics, but he also turned in an impressive amount of sci-fi work. Some of those titles are now staples of the genre, and nobody but Heston could have carried them through to that state.

So in honor of Mr. Heston's recent passing, I bring to you two belated reviews of recent viewings:

"The Omega Man" (1971)

Richard Matheson's fantastic novel "I Am Legend" gets it's second big-screen rendition with Heston in the lead as "Robert Neville." The Omega Man came not too long after Vincent Price's take on the tale in 1964's "The Last Man on Earth," which I consider to be the superior cinematic adaptation of the novel.

In this telling, the living dead are more of a vampire/zombie hybrid — they have a sort of reorganized or structured society, they carry on civilized conversations. In this regard, they are closer to the figures presented in the novel than those of the recent remake.

All in all, this edition has a few points that are more complex compared with the other two outings. But at it's heart, it's still about isolation, fear of the dark, battling the walking dead and blowing stuff up every chance you get.

Grade: B - (it's pretty good, but Price's is still the tops)

"Soylent Green" (1973)

Heston comes back to the sci-fi field relatively quick with the adaptation of Harry Harrison's "Make Room! Make Room!" We are once again treated to a memorable performance and that classic line that gives it all away: "Soylent Green is (bleep)!" (sorry, trying to avoid the spoilers....)

The film skillfully captures the whole dying-world-pushed-to-the-brink-by-people message, coupling environmentalism, global warming, overpopulation and food scarcity into a neat little package. Heston just happens to be an overworked and somewhat shady cop trying to keep this crazy world in balance when duties call for him to get to the bottom of the whole solyent conspiracy.

This production obviously has some age on it, and it still feels dated though it is a forward-looking tale of impending doom for mankind. It's not that great a mystery, but it's still an entertaining and unique romp into what could be a very bleak twilight for humanity.

Grade: C+ (you could do much worse than this one ...)

"City of Industry" - D-

Here's another short review, because there's just not much to say about this one....

There are good "California" movies, and there are really bad "California" movies. The 1997 crapfest known as "City of Industry" is one of the worst of all time.

All the leads — even Harvey Keitel — deliver two-dimensional and silly performances in a pointless heist-gone-bad tale. What could have been a pretty good crime movie tinged with revenge is instead just another terrible production to be avoided.

Grade D- (This one is really bad ..... I mean it)

"30 Days of Nights" - D

Really, I don't have much to say about "30 Days of Nights," which is new to DVD this month.

It's a startlingly unoriginal production. It's boring, and brings very little new to the table for the genre. And the ending is silly, even by the rest of the movie's standards.

It's not a total fall-on-its-face bomb, but it offers little in the way of entertainment.

Grade: D (skip this one for sure .....)

"The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford" - A

When I pulled the Jesse James DVD from the shelf of my local Blockbuster, the clerk gave me a dubious, "Humm ....," as he rung up the rental. "I've heard good and bad about this one," he said. "People have said you either like it, or you hate it."

I thought that was a great sign; that typically means you're in store for a great tale. And I wasn't disappointed.

My two all-time favorite films are "The Good, The Bad and The Ugly" and "The Wild Bunch." I sometimes go back and forth about which of the two I enjoy more; they're uniquely intriguing with very distinctive thematic differences. Perhaps my strong dedication to these films predisposed me to liking 2007's "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford."

But let me offer you this opinion without qualifiers: "The Assassination of Jesse James" isn't a good movie; it's a fantastic film.

Overview: Viewers are given an insightful trip through the finale of Jesse James' life as he commits his last crime and grows weary. His trademark "distant person" lifestyle merges with his paranoias, driving him to a bloody end at the hands of Robert Ford.

This title is all about the journey, the intertwining of personalities and lives that brought James and Ford together and drove them apart. And even though you know from the start the eventual outcome of this strange partnership, it still hits you like a fist when you see how it transpires — the hallmark of a remarkable production.

This is not an oat opera with horseback chases. There is some gun play, but it's short and bloody without any glamor or gloss. There are, however, numerous examples of mesmerizing cinematography coupled with a sparse, haunting soundtrack from Nick Cave and Warren Ellis.

Brad Pitt is solid and intense. Casey Affleck delivers a stunning characterization of Robert Ford. He is able to delve into all the emotions that would make you feel disgust and pity for all that he does and all that he becomes. It's truly unreal.

This is a must-see drama that had me riveted from start to finish. Again, it isn't good ... it's great.

"Gone Baby Gone" - D+

Hey look everybody! It's a movie with Casey Affleck, and it's directed by his big brother, Ben.

Wow; it's even based on a book by that guy who wrote "Mystic River." Remember that one? That's the one with Sean Penn and a bunch of other people ... Clint Eastwood directed it. It wasn't great, but it wasn't too terrible. Remember?

Well then that means this new one should be good, right? Right?

Er, well .....

The wrap sheet: Casey's this detective (of sorts) hanging around in his old Boston neighbor. He and his live-in love interest have a gift for finding the undesirables in their community .... people who skip out on responsibilities to their families or creditors or whoever.

And when a child in his hood goes missing, the kid's aunt and uncle get the dynamic duo to work their magic. As Casey and company get deeper into the case, there are more twists and turns than they ever expected.

Danger, action and intrigue ensue.

What the @*&#!: Ok; there are probably some out there with this as their next request on Netflix or Blockbuster or whatever. Trust me, I have no intentions of spoiling any of it for you. I might, however, help you juggle your viewing priorities.

This movie is nowhere near as good as half a dozen other cop, kidnapping or caper pics that you could get. It is sluggish, boring and unimaginative. There is really very little redeeming value in sitting through this one over many other similarly themed outings.

That's not to say that Casey's completely terrible; in fact, he does a fairly good job here. And Ed Harris brings it with the normal intensity that he shares in nearly every role.

So what's the problem? The story, that's what's wrong here. It's irreparably flawed in its logical progression. I haven't read the book to compare source material and movie, but it's such a shame that this many talents couldn't come together for something a little more substantive.

And there's the little matter of the silly overuse of swearing. I mean, there might have been fewer f-bombs here than in "The Departed," but I seemed to notice them a lot more in this one. It's like stumbling across a bunch of prepubescents sharing their wealth of questionable phrases. It's a terrible distraction that adds to the weakness of the picture.

In fact, go get "The Departed" instead of this if you haven't watched it already ....

Grade: D+ (boring baby boring ... )

"Michael Clayton" - C+

Fresh to DVD just in time for the Oscars, last year's "Michael Clayton" is a legal thriller that seeks to reset the genre's paradigm and manages to make some interesting strides in the attempt.

The case notes: George Clooney is Michael Clayton, a lawyer with a specialized practice of fixing unique problems for clients of a high-dollar firm. If you find yourself in a hit-and-run and you're a good enough client, Michael's the guy they send to solve all your troubles.

But Clayton has a lot of personal problems of his own, and they're starting to take a toll on how he sees his entire profession and what he's accomplished. Add in a highly unusual set of circumstances for one of his firm's biggest cases, and the stars are aligning for a life-altering chain of events that could even kill him.

Almost not your average lawyer: Just as Michael Clayton is not your everyday ambulance chaser, so this movie is not the total standard-issue legal thriller — it's not full of courtrooms and heavy-handed discussions of the right and wrong of the law. What this movie does deliver is a Hollywood-like character study about extraordinary outside influences reshaping someone, what they do and who they are.

There's really no easy way to explain what happens without delving too much into the minutia of the entire ploy, which really only serves as a stage for these near-spiritual transformations. But I believe you'll discover this title carries only a few new approaches before sadly resorting to the old tried-and-true methods of reaching resolution.

And yes, this is a Clooney-heavy production as you might imagine. But there are many a shining moment from Tom Wilkinson as "Arthur Edens" and the always delightfully evil Tilda Swinton as anti-Clayton "Karen Crowder." These two are solid supporters for Clooney to bounce off his usual so-so delivery.

Is this a fantastic film? No, but it's fairly good as far as mainstream releases go. It has many notes that hint at influences from producer Steven Soderbergh, but it just doesn't make a completely clean break from the typical norm.

Grade: C+ (it's just good, not great ......)

Double review

Sure ... I'd expect French cinema to be pretentious, but I thought the recent proliferation of American musical movies would have improved the genre by now. But that isn't the case.

Here are two quick reviews of some recent viewings that brought little to the table.

1. "Across the Universe"



What previews made out to be a kind of good idea turned out to be exactly what you would have guessed: self-absorbed, self-important drivel. "Across the Universe" is nothing more than an artsy wanna be production stringing together unlikable characters through poorly arranged Beatles video segments.

These songs are not good reimaginings of the original Beatles greats; they're irritatingly annoying and totally boring. Lifeless songs, silly visuals, unbelievable characters and other loose creative holds make this one a waste.

Grade: D (for being boring and surprisingly unoriginal ..... and messing with a few great Beatles tunes)


2. "13 Tzameti"



Supposedly, the French-fried "13 Tzameti" was so good it deserved a bag of awards from many international film gatherings. And while I found most of the initial build-up to be fairly good, the remaining "execution" was laughable.

In short, a youngster ends up stealing and taking advantage of passage to a secret event he knows nothing about. Once on the scene, the dude quickly realizes he's in a very different world where he could either earn a lot of money or die a nasty death.

Sounds interesting, right? I agree with you; it's a great mysterious premise. The problem comes in the heavy-handed, sluggish and vacuous production. There is so much promise here, but it all falls apart. Before it's over, you'll likely find yourself accurately guessing how all the underdeveloped characters close it out.

Grade: D+ (great idea ..... bad follow through)

"Casshern" - B-

At a time that I cannot really recall clearly, some little switch inside my peabrain was flipped and I gave up on seeing movies just because they looked "cool." For some reason, I wasn't satisfied any longer with the promise of "great graphical representation" over substance.

Sure I've seen some great looking stuff here and there since, but I haven't really gone bananas over many feature-length films because of the way they look.

Enter the very fine Japanese import, "Casshern," and watch me do a reverse .....

Superhero anime comes to life: In an apocalypse-now future, the Asian world is rocked with intercontinental war. Populations are decimated, and little future awaits any of the civilizations engaged in the robot-driven super battle.

Just as things couldn't get more out of control, a genetics program spawns a new breed of mutated humans bent on annihilating its predecessors.

All seems lost until a mythical superhero emerges, seemingly capable of changing the world forever.

CG in overdrive: Where to begin with this one ....

Apparently, the source material for the film was a 1970s anime series with similar themes and characters. Though I wasn't familiar with the original program, this 2004 release did more than hold its own.

As I said at the beginning, this is a visually startling production. The computer-driven scenery is nearly flawless in places, and the animated backdrop greatly accentuates the bleak and gritty drama and action.

Overall, the story tends to lean on the thin, if not a bit patchy, side. But at the end of the day, this is a superhero movie, and most of those titles tend to be vacuous. The great graphics more than make up for places where the production otherwise limps along.

Check your brain at the door, grab some greasy popcorn and give this one a spin when you wanna have your eyes tickled for a bit.

Grade: B- (for wowing me time and again with some special heroics ...)

"Rescue Dawn" - B+

Ok . . . so my consecutive reviews of Christian Bale flicks took a slight detour with the recent unveiling of that zombie pic. But you should always know that this blog breaks for Romero. (His comment, "It takes a lot to scare me, man," was just priceless ....)

Anyway, it's back to business with the 2006 release, "Rescue Dawn," which is relatively new to DVD. This Bale movie was a real undertaking, which is why 2006 only brought this one and "The Prestige."

And when you see what they had to go through to get this one done, you'll understand why there wasn't much else going on .....

Flight plan for the story: Bale is Dieter Dengler, a German native with a desire for nothing more than to fly the fastest planes he could access. As a young boy, he had seen the gleaming eyes of the pilots bombing his home town, he wanted nothing more than to assume the control and power he witnessed.

Dieter got his chance in the service of the U.S. Navy in the beginning of the Vietnam era. His first venture met with disaster as he ended up in Laos as a prisoner of war. But his story of survival and an unbelievable trek through the merciless jungle are a tale for the ages.

Realistic to an unknown degree: There is so much "living it" going on here that it's almost a documentary. Those skin-and-bone appearances aren't makeup or computer-generated graphics; the actors became dangerously thin to stay truthful to the account of these POWs. And yes, they really ate the bugs served for lunch.

Everyone credited the gonzo direction of one Werner Herzog for bringing out the best in Bale, usually funny guy Steve Zahn and the rest. Herzog was knee-deep in the jungle with the leads, cutting through the dense underbrush; he was with them floating down the same snake-filled river. Herzog was living the same intense, hellish conditions as everyone else.

The final product shows the drive everyone had to honor the memory of Dengler and the others who were not so lucky. They all wanted to bring the real-life drama to a new generation, and they accomplished their mission. The scenes are moving, the tension is high and the heroics are admirable.

And, you'll get another strong argument for why Bale might be one of the better actors working in mainstream film today. See it for yourself, and then let me know what you think.

Grade: B + (of the highest available degree ...)

"3:10 to Yuma" - C+

New to DVD this week is last year's western, "3:10 to Yuma" — a remake of a 1957 movie of the same title, which is based on a story by the one and only Elmore Leonard.

I like Leonard's work, and some of his stories have made great movies, and I haven't seen the original "3:10," which I suspect is a much stronger production. While I did enjoy seeing how this one's internal conflicts about honesty and being a man bubbled to the surface, there is still much left to be desired.

Nevertheless, here's my take on this tale.

Shoot from the hip: Dan Evans (Christian Bale) is a poor cattleman struggling to keep his little ranch and his family together. But when the Evans family unknowingly crosses paths with legendary criminal, Ben Wade (Russell Crowe), everything changes.

Dan Evans is financially compelled to join a small band escorting Wade to the 3:10 train leaving for Yuma and the territory's prison. Completing the mission will mean everything (one way or the other) for both Evans and Wade, but will either be able to keep their forced commitments?

Taking the high road: Crowe's "Ben Wade" is the stereotype of western baddies from all the worst examples. He's this erudite murderer, unrivaled gunslinger and ravaging romantic with Bible quotes for every occasion and the ability to freehand sketch still-life images at the drop of a hat. It's just way too much.

On the flip side, Bale's "Dan Evans" performance is deftly executed as a nearly crippled war "veteran" losing his grip on all that he holds dear. Such a believable delivery really shines in an otherwise lackluster movie.

Even with the overall sluggish first half and some patchy performances from supporters, a great ending awaits. It gives me such mixed feelings about the picture as a whole; save for the last 30 minutes or so, this is a weak one.

As I said, stick it out and get to that big punchline. The closing sequences are nearly worthy to post up against some of the better western of long ago. No, it's as good as my two all-time favorite films (click here and here). But it's pretty darn entertaining . . . one might even say exciting and, at times, interesting.

There are so many promising things all jumbled up in this modern-day oat opera. There could have been a lot more done with those shining elements, but unfortunately this title is no real barn burner.

Special recommendation: I'm not saying you should completely skip the new "3:10," but I do have an alternative that covers much of the same territory in a much better manner.

If you're looking for drama with some good gun play, check out 1962's "Ride the High Country" with Randolph Scott and Joel McCrea. Director Sam Peckinpah brought these two screen legends together to produce a classic tale of what it means to be a hero and tame the wilder side of the frontier.

And you're in luck! "Ride the High Country" was reissued on DVD toward the end of last year, so it should be pretty easy to find. All the same morals and similar conflicts as "3:10," but delivered in a much more pleasing manner. (It's easily an A- on my scale)

Grade: C+ (of the highest grade possible ... again, the last 30 minutes is the true saving grace here)

"Two-Lane Blacktop" - A-

Way back in the day, there was this acceptable genre of film that involved bikers, solitary drivers, racers and other nomads heading (seemingly without aim) from one side of the country to the other. These, my friends, were the road pictures — men and machines racing against their fellow man as well as the inevitable march of time.

These pictures were dusty and desolate feature-length rides across America. Rebels and squares battled it out, or the last cowboy relived the better days in the fleeting glory of the dying west. These films always cover the same topics and the same emotions, but some were a little more memorable and deftly crafted than others.

Enter what many consider the greatest of these films — 1971's "Two-Lane Blacktop," which is now freshly pressed by the extremely good folks over at Criterion. (I once again offer the shameless promotion of those genius arthouse film nerds ... thanks guys and gals)

Road map to a great time: Two gearheads are tripping from place to place, racing for a hundred bucks here or a needed part or tool there. These guys — singer James Taylor and the late drummer Dennis Wilson — happen upon a few strange circumstances and end up racing their home-grown '55 Chevy cross country against a stock 1970 GTO piloted by a man with no name (the immortal Warren Oates).

The race is on: "Two-Lane Blacktop" is a great video time capsule capturing the last years of the famous Route 66. And it isn't easy to count the number of subsequent films that drew some of their inspiration from director Monte Hellman's road movie.

This is a production that's more about what's going on around the leads — which includes the cars — rather than some conversation occurring on screen. Hellman purposefully set his cameras to make it easier for you to catch all the action in any given scene, and you're meant to look around at what is happening behind and beside the actors.

The soundtrack has no music other than a brief tune or two played on a car stereo. There isn't much of a developing plot as much as their are overall themes carried from one day to the next. (Hellman filmed sequentially, gradually moving from one part of the country to the other while only supplying a day's worth of shooting scripts to the actors.)

Overall, the acting isn't great save for a few memorable scenes and lines coming from Oates' "GTO" character. But that isn't the reason to see this film; you're coming to watch how these simple players and their fast machines compel you to anticipate what's around the next curve.

And as is the case with any Criterion DVD, there are enough specials and added extras on the making of, and motivations behind, this film that you couldn't see it all in one sitting. You're going to get hours of viewing pleasure out of this set.

Grade: A - (Warren Oates . . . the cars . . . the scenery . . . yep, it's worth it.)

"American Gangster" - C-

Ridley Scott's "American Gangster" has been praised, bashed and rehashed since its release. Detractors have stated that it's too sensational and absent of the truth surrounding real-life druglord, Frank Lucas. And still others have opposed the movie as a blatant glorification of the "gangster" lifestyle.

Whatever your final take, there is no ignoring the strong attempt to draw your attention back to the organized crime genre and period piece. Why else would you stack the deck with so many heavy-hitting personalities?

The rap sheet: Denzel Washington portrays 1970's bad guy Frank Lucas, a self-styled mobster with a heavy hand in the NYC drug trade. If the film is to be believed, Lucas "Wal-Marted" the crime world — contacting the manufacturers, purchasing directly from the source and selling it cheaper than the competition.

Things ramp up for Lucas as he gets more involved, and then he comes to the attention of super-good cop Richie Roberts (Russell Crowe). Roberts had left the overly corrupt NYC police to work for the feds in shutting down the local drug industry, including Lucas.

Crime drama ensues.

Good and bad: The first half of the film strings along numerous snippets to give you insights into the motivation and background of the leads, and this is where the seams are really apparent. The whole backstory portion of this movie makes for a choppy mess that is unpleasant and almost hard to follow. It's not a complete loss, but it's in rather rough shape.

Once you escape the lead-in hype, the movie kind of settles into its own. There are a few moments where Ridley Scott was tipping the cap to Scorsese, but it's only a passing fancy. You won't for a moment forget that you're not setting before one of those other masterfully crafted crime films. But you might find yourself thinking a little about Sidney Lumet's "Serpico," which isn't all bad, I suppose.

In the end this is really the Denzel Washington show, which could have been great. And there might have been more good things to say if there was more back-and-forth between Washington and Crowe, but the story doesn't lend itself to it. Regardless, you won't be treated to the same sparking performance Washington delivered with the very fine fictional "Inside Man." Heck, he isn't even as flashy and evil as he comes off in "Training Day."

Believable story? No ... not as presented. Apparently, all the real people involved in this account have said the movie is over-the-top in make believe.

Great performances? Not really. Josh Brolin delivers as a crooked SIU cop who is bought and paid for many times over. Everybody else is kinda lackluster; there aren't many memorable moments and great scenes. Don't give up on Ridley Scott or Denzel Washington; Russell Crowe remains lifeless, so you can either take him or leave him when it's all said and done.

There are many other great crime films, many of which are based on true stories. In fact, you'd probably be better served by checking out one of those instead.

Grade: C - (of the lowest degree available)

"I Am Legend" - C+

The latest drop in the Hollywood big bucket o' blockbusters is the Will Smith vehicle, "I Am Legend." A nice departure from the holiday doldrums of pure drivel, this title delivers . . . well, to some degree. At least, it isn't flat horrible.

How it goes: Humanity is cheering the latest in medical discoveries — a cure for cancer realized by monkeying around with a common virus. Everything is peachy, until just about every person in the world is "killed" as the cancer treatment becomes a mutated, airborne zombie-making superbug. Those that become the living dead shun the light, hiding by day and eating everyone else at night.

Will's an Army research scientist/doctor determined to find a cure for the disease. He ends up staying in New York City and becomes, as far as he's concerned, the last man on earth. But, he never gives up the quest for a positive resolution.

Hollywood reruns: The movie is an adaptation of the classic novel by the same title. The book is a staple of the genre written by the masterful Richard Matheson, he a driving force behind those creepy original "Twilight Zones" and other spinetinglers.

Matheson's work is a how-to on horror and zombie tales; the story is an original attempt to disquiet you through the terror of loneliness, the peril of having your flesh eaten and the very real chance that no matter what you do, life as you know it is over. It's a great book with a lot to offer.

The film adaptations include the first and best showing, "The Last Man on Earth," with the immortal Vincent Price, and the later lackluster, "The Omega Man," with the one and only Charlton Heston.

So, how does Smith's iteration of the Robert Neville character stack up? In short, not bad.

Some of his scenes are really gripping; you can buy the funk of isolation and the drive to adapt propelling the character. But a couple of times the veneer is worn and we get to see the lead leaning towards his goofy state, and the overall pacing gets sluggish for a moment.

However, the biggest drawback here is the CG, which is plan awful. I mean, there are times it looks like someone took the worst effects from those cheesy "Mummy" titles and slammed them against another Smith picture — the cinematic travesty that is "I, Robot."

All the way around, this is a pretty good take on the timeless tale. Some of the imagery is captivating and the more intense moments bring along the scary. Check your hyper-discriminating senses at the door, and enjoy an out-of-season popcorn flick.

Grade: C+ (of the highest degree possible)

"No Country for Old Men" - A

You may or may not have seen it yet, but "No Country for Old Men" continues to steamroll its way up the "favorites" list of award watchers everywhere. We recently made our way to our favorite movie spot to check out the phenomenon drawn from the Cormac McCarthy novel.

What you're in for: An average, everyday guy is enjoying a day of hunting when he happens upon a scene of carnage from a drug deal gone sour. The man's interest leads him to uncover a rather large sum of money left over from the killings, and he takes advantage of the opportunity at hand. What the new millionaire fails to consider is the truly savage drive of an unknown enemy to get his money back.

"No Country" is a character study bathed in blood. You are deftly guided along a twisting and torturous route through the lives of the average guy, the mad murderer, the law and others drawn together because of the missing money. This is a great tale with all of the fine elements of stories about extraordinary obstacles, mortality, morality and those making sense of a world long-gone crazy.

This film is packed with solid and powerful performances from Tommy Lee Jones, Javier Bardem and Josh Brolin, among others. You'll even get an on-the-mark showing from Woody Harrelson in a simple, yet vital, supporting role. Directors Joel and Ethan Coen get back on their game here as well, fantastically directing their screenplay and crafting a moody yet enjoyable ride through the backroads of humanity.

I suppose it's hard to find too much fault with this film. Yes, some people will have problems with the ending, and still others will not enjoy the nontraditional (or at least not standard-issue Hollywood) method by making you stop to consider why characters are making their decisions. I also enjoyed the Coen's attention to detail as it relates to not inundating the audience with useless dialog, blaring background music and all of the other garbage that detracts from better dramas of the modern era.

To sum it up, go see this one before it hits DVD. Your ticket purchase will commend the establishment for producing an entertaining film, and you'll be rewarded with a great cinematic experience.

Grade: "A" .... this one is great from start to finish. Go see it today.

"Ratatouille" - A

Relatively new to DVD, the Disney/Pixar adventure "Ratatouille" is the best outing yet for the all-digital animators. I've always enjoyed the Pixar pictures, and I own a fistful of them on DVD. You know your going to get crisp and imaginative visuals with a good story. These guys have not disappointed me so far.

But hands down, "Ratatouille" is one of the best (if not the best) examples of mass-market, family friendly animated entertainment I can think of for the modern era.

Cheesy plot overview: Remy, a silly mouse from the country, has ambitions of being more than your average vermin. His biggest wish is show his friends and family a different way to enjoy their lives with the magic of professionally prepared food — his own culinary creations. Remy ends up in Paris at the world's most famous restaurant, and he quickly discovers an outlet for his chef-ish desires.

This one is good from start to finish. The voice acting intertwines seamlessly with the flawless animation. The action sequences are vivid, entertaining and original. All the little subplots of self-discovery, family, love and living the dream are fresh enough to keep this from being just another Pixar toon.

There is so much subtle humor in the action and scenery to keep savvy viewers laughing throughout. And the super-talented Peter O'Toole delivers a knockout performance as the "Grim Eater, Anton Ego." Oh .... and pretty much everybody else is good, too.

Grade: A (I doubt you'll find another comparable flick delivering as much fun ....)

"Carnival of Souls" - B+

There are many, many horrible films still floating around the net and dollar bins across this county thanks to that copyright miracle known as public domain. Fortunately there's also a few that are worth the buck, and one of those is 1962's "Carnival of Souls."

There's plenty of ready evidence of the truly low-budget nature of this movie, but it still stands up as a chilling story of the Twilight Zone variety. Believe me, I got goosebumps watching this one ...

This is how the story goes: This young, girl-next-door type is out joy riding with some friends when they decide to drag race with some local goofies. The race ends with a horrific crash that claims the lives of all the girls but one.

The lone survivor decides that she's now ready for a fresh start in a new town. She leaves home alone to take on a new job and new living arrangements. And that's when all these strange visions, including a reoccuring image of the above ghoul, begin making their appearance to her alone.

So, what's so good about it? Yes, there are some bad edits and a few silly lines here and there, but all and all this isn't an absolutely horrible flick. All of the soundtrack features the creepiest church organ music you've ever heard. The ghastly make-up is only matched by the super-scary lighting and other simple frights.

And there in lies the strength of this film — it's simply scary, like a good Twilight Zone tale. You will be bothered by the apparitions and the music and the overall dark mood. There is even evidence of the attempt to craft a real horror movie and not just muddle through to get it done; I was impressed.

There are a number of ways to obtain copies of this movie, including a Criterion Collection edition. Whatever the pressing, get it; it's worth the money.

Grade: B+

"28 Weeks Later" - B +

Anybody who has talked with me about movies and films will know that I don't do well with crap, and at the same time I am a complete sucker for zombie flicks. I don't think I have seen a zombie or zombie-like movie that I didn't enjoy on some level, even if they were so bad they were good.

But there is no excuse-making necessary for the very fine "28 Weeks Later." This is one solid horror/thrill movie with all the right sources of terror skillfully applied. Yes, there is the obvious problem caused by having deranged zombie people racing to eat your flesh, but there are also these disquieting moments of realizing that you're truly alone in places where you ordinarily couldn't hear yourself think. In other words, the fright comes from more than physical danger.

This is a great follow-up to "28 Days Later." There are solid performances from all the lead and supporting characters. The cinematography and music score mesh seamlessly. Everything hits on all cylinders.

In short: go see this movie, even if the thought of the living dead gives you the undying creeps. You will find so many things done right in making you uncomfortable, you'll love it.

Grade: Solid well-earned B +

"Dead Alive" (aka "Braindead") - B+

Almost a decade before Peter Jackson brought us the first installment of his definitive cinematic expression of the "Lord of the Rings" trilogy, he was doing all he could to make our stomachs churn with "Dead Alive" (aka "Braindead").

And I have to hand it to him; in "Dead Alive," I think he out Romeroed George A. Romero.

"Dead Alive" is by far the most bloody gore-filled zombie romp I have ever seen. It has a fantastic sense of humor whereby you find yourself more often laughing than squirming at the sight of so much dismemberment and flesh consumption.

Plot (applied here loosely): The bite of a freakishly evil monkey turns a prudish elderly lady into her sheltered son's worst nightmare.

This movie has very interesting visual effects that had to require some original engineering to complete without the assistance of today's sophisticated computers. There are multiple zombie and human death sequences the likes of which do not exist anywhere else — period.

I'm not sure how easy it is to come by this film, but I picked up a new copy of a no-frills edition at Wal-Mart for less than $8. If you see it, get it and enjoy the splatter comedy that follows.

Grade: B+ (for originality and humor mixed with some good old-fashioned, zombie-style action)

"Saw III" - D

Hey, remember that little movie franchise known as the "Saw" films? If you haven't heard, they came out with a flick last year — "Saw III" — and now it's out on DVD. Wow, what a way to keep your player happy for a few minutes . . .

Let me say this about the whole "Saw" series: I think the first movie was great for the genre, but the last two have steadily gone down-hill directly. Fans should be happy with the very real possibility that "Saw III" is the last film (if the storyline is to be believed, that is...).

Now I know there are some of you out there who have said that "Saw" is really only good for a few laughs; still some others were pretty disturbed by what occurred.

I let the first one go by for a long time. I was in the camp that thought the first movie would be teenage slasher fodder of the worst kind. Instead, I found a tight story with really good performances and plot twists provided by Michael Emerson ("Henry" from "Lost"), Cary Elwes ("Westley" from "The Princess Bride") and Danny Glover ("Murtaugh" from "Lethal Weapon"). It was a nice, original mystery without the overall reliance on seeing people graphically tortured to death.

But the second movie was just not as good. The plot was somewhat thinner, and the traps were a lot more reliant on placing gore in your face. And this most recent installment is about the same — a marginal mystery with way too much bone-popping, meat-flinging closeup views of horribly uncomfortable and graphic deaths.

I did, however, find the end of "Saw III" to have a great twist close to the "oh man!" factor of "Saw." If you find yourself increasingly nauseated by the mounds of human pieces (which I was not, but I know some who will), you've got to stick it out. You will get a slight reprieve before the final punch.

Again, I sure hope this is the last film. I believe the only possible plot devices that could continue the "Jigsaw" performance have either been employed here already or are just so far off the mark as to make the franchise even less.

ADDITION: Upon further reflection, I meant to convey that "Saw II" and "Saw III" are nowhere near as entertaining as "Saw" because the entire mystery factor of the first film was usurped by the splatter gore of the next two. In short, "Saw" was a different kind of "whodunnit;" the others are much more about the torture, which I do not think is either entertaining or original.

Grade: D (for ruining the franchise)